Browsing

Fashion! According to I the most reputable critic of anything really.



Oh Karl!
Not a big fan of the Japanese horror film-inspired make up but that dress is gorgeous!

But Chloe can only seem to produce box-like outfits fit only for Cheryl's trip to Woolies 2 weeks after giving birth to Wayne's fifth child (well she says they're all Wayne's but Jenny next door knows the truth.) End tangent.

Dior has gone all goth too although I do like a lot of the red.

And MiuMiu, who I normally despise, has pulled out some cute little numbers like this one:



LOVE the red shoes!

Similarly I loathe Stella McCartney simply because anyone stupid enough to give up leather shoes does not deserve my respect. However, this is adorable and I’m a sucker for Gemma Ward.



And finally, Hermes have done some wonderful things with pencil skirts and opaques which was my intended staple for the Winter and therefore gets my vote as favourite in Paris this week.

I'm worried...

I think I might be... falling in love.

YES! WORRIED!!

I'm jaded. I'm over love. It hurts too much. It feels wonderful being with them but then you're life just seems to feel empty when they're gone. Pft! Love fucking sucks.

I'm bored with being in love... except it kinda feels nice... I think. Maybe I'm not in love. I thought maybe he said that he loved me while we were away. On our first night away even. But I think maybe I dreamt it. I was really drunk. We drank cocktails and Champagne and Pinot and ate three courses including cheese (mmmm... blue and Pinot are destined to be together) and I think maybe the cheese made me have crazy dreams... cos it usually does... and now I don't know if maybe he did say he loved me and I just rolled over and passed out or if I actually dreamt it. I think maybe I dream it. He didn't say anything about it the next day but then maybe he was too drunk to remember he said it afterall... uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh!!! I don't know!

New flat mate moved in while we were away. My other flatmate (the bestest flatmate ever) is this gay magnet. They orbit around her like moons. Anyway, so Gay moved in and he's excellent. The house has never been this clean. The garbage is always empty and the dishwasher is always full of clean dishes (or on, or empty, or full of dirty ones and I'm going to put it on later... anyway...) So yay! Plus you know less rent.

Planning our trip to Europe for June. Only thing is its horribly hard when you don't know if you have a job at the end of May. Effing cunts aren't telling us til then. Too bad for all the unemployed people who applied. Fuckers! But the plan is going well. I haven't even asked for the time off yet but meh!

Going to see my Dad on Monday for dinner. Bringing boy. Wish me luck! I was going to take him to see my mum as well but when I rang her tonight she was in a cunt of a mood. She is fucking bi-polar I swear! When she answered I knew it was bad. Then I thought she would cheer up cos I was coming to see her. Her biggest gripe was that I didn't ring her or come and see her on the long weekend. I had already told her that I was away and that it was my first real holiday in 2 years and she made a big fucking deal that I didn't make the time to see her. Then when I told her I probably wouldn't be in Australia for my birthday cos I would be in Europe she hit the roof. She started going on about its her 50th next year and if I can afford to go away and go to Europe then I can afford the petrol to go and see her. Then she went on about how I better start saving for a present for her 50th and blah blah blah blah blah. Her favourite thing is to go on about how I pick fights with her. But then all I did tonight was ring her to organise a visit and she starts a fight with me about how I never visit.

I'm looking up blackmarket lithium suppliers as I type this. I'll pop it in a Cenovis Women's Mutli bottle and she won't notice a thing.

It's really distressing for me because I've always wanted a good relationship with my mother. I'm really jealous of girls that go shopping with their mums and talk to their mums about everything. I try to be friends with her but when she attacks me like this without any provocation I can't help but want her completely out of my life. When the mood takes her there is nothing I can say or do to make her happy and she just yells and yells and yells and yells. I ended the call by saying (over the top of her rant) "you wonder why I never want to spend time with you..." and hanging up. I could still hear her yelling as I hung up the phone.

Everything felt wrong

I had my ex over for dinner last night. We made pizzas and drank red wine. It just didn't feel right.

I love him so much. He is wonderful. He is funny, handsome, smart, sophisticated and, as much as he denies it, he is kind and caring. But it just didn’t feel right.

For me, there’s just no spark. He doesn’t make my tummy crazy bubbly nervous and I don’t want to jump him… at all. I just don’t feel like that about him.

But he’s IN LOVE with me! And now he doesn’t want to see me anymore because it is too hard for him. I feel miserable. I want to hug him and tell him it’s alright but I can’t reciprocate his feelings for me.

It’s very confusing for me because I obviously still CARE ABOUT him and I want him to be happy. I know I have to let him go and hope that he will eventually feel differently about me so that we can be friends.

I’ve never felt like this about someone before. I can vividly remember being in love with him but I know I’m not now. I don’t hate him. I’m not angry any more. I want him to be happy and healthy and successful.

I can’t imagine life without him.

It’s desolate.

I’m so upset. I’m mourning a friendship that I thought I had but always suspected was short-lived. I can’t stop crying…